these days

Sophia and Rebecca being kitties, with their faces painted with cocoa paste,
just like my Mum used to do with me.

Well, today is the 30th, but as you can see from the date above, I started this post 2 weeks ago - sorry for the silence - if only you could access all the mental blogs I've composed! Seems computer time is a rare thing these days. For real. I have been sorting through the ups and downs of a whole new phase of motherhood. Having a 3 year old and an 8 month old is hard work - have you heard about that? So how do I say that without feeling it's a total negative? Without explaining that in the same day I can feel incredible joy and extreme anger? That just saying, "It's hard" is not betraying me, my kids, my Mum, God? I guess you just say it.

Today is an up. I feel like I am making progress. that is my mantra these days thanks to Fly Lady - "Progress, not perfection."


Eleanor is seriously mobile and so that means a whole new level of baby watching. She has four teeth and is fearless, she tosses herself headlong everywhere - Wade may get his dream retirement plan of child professional skateboarders yet, though Sophia is not sure she wants to learn to juggle fire yet. Today Sophia decided to empty her own potty- full of poo - in the bathroom sink. She was so good about it "Oh Mum, I am so sorry, I will never ever do that again", it was easy to be gracious - just smelly.

We were tagged weeks ago (I can't believe it, wasn't it just the other day?) by Ari & Noah
and it's our first tag! so here goes:

Here are the rules: You must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. (If you don't have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.) When you are tagged you need to write your own blog-post and then choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag. Don't forget to leave them a comment telling them they're tagged, and to read your blog.

Sophia Joanna Jubilee

J - Joyous - Sophia wakes up happy every day. I can never ever remember her waking grumpy.

U - Ubiquitous - I learned this word from Don Neufeld. It means it seems you are everywhere at the same time. From the music to fun to the mess, Soph fills up the house when she is here.

B- Ballet- she was meant to take ballet in July but the 4 month, city wide strike cancelled the class, yet she still loves all things balletic, dances a lot and believes she is an excellent ballerina already, though no professional has ever told her so. I hope that confidence never goes away.

I- Ice Cream - There can never be enough. The only child I know who at the age of 2 turned down plain vanilla ice cream with smarties because she heard us talking about gelato later on.

L- Lyrical - (OK, I used a thesaurus for this one) - Sophia sings all the time and makes up songs. Wade and I often comment that her life is a musical.

E- Eat - She loves to eat all kinds of things I had never even tasted until I was in my 20's. her education started early and she still loves to find treats in her Malaysian seafood soup and yell "Squid!"

E- Exultant - It has been so interesting to see our girls become what we named them. (or rather, see how what God put on our hearts for their names, come to pass) We named Sophia with the middle name Jubilee and she is a kid who loves to celebrate. She LOVES it when it is any one's birthday and she has pretend birthday parties all the time. her Auntie Heidi gave her some money the other day, and despite my explanations that we had lots at home she chose to buy her own package of birthday candles to play birthday with. Jubilee indeed.

Angela Eleanor Joie

J - Joie - joy in French. She is what she is called. The Joie-baby is SO happy so much of the time and laughs and makes others laugh too.

O - Outgoing - she;'s already diving in to any kind of movement, pulling herself up, and when we do "ladies ride" bounces on our knee - she has been known to flip her own legs over her head!

I - Ir·re·press·i·ble - incapable of being repressed or restrained; uncontrollable: irrepressible laughter.

E - EEEEEEEEEEE! the sound she makes most often to communicate. She's a screamer!

Thanks Heather - this was fun!

So, since you can tag one person for every letter in your name (I will be merciful and choose Joie), I tag Jan, Leanne, Jessi and Ange and Jamie
and since I have a bizarre habit of memorizing people's middle names, I look forward to see what Leah, Beth, Mae, Amy and Lee have to tell us about themselves.

Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving everyone...we celebrated yesterday and our friend Hannah took a few pics of the fam.

And now Sophia wants to type.

ryn4ybt5j9uy7nnjiyh hgnbyhghuj uttgdfru85tyb7tu8by7b77b6bytyy6t6tg6by5tybgu5805tbyt5by5b5bu5bt6b6bt689bu5tun5nn8u76tutut gi5t5nugt5nnbgbssds jfunng g5ntr5bqer7h7u56yuyyuthghmnby
h
lu

yumr8tfyhng44nfyftnnt

(This says: Happy Thanksgiving at church and we also has another Thanksgiving at our house. When are you coming to see us soon? from Sophia Pallister.)





One of the best, best things about yesterday was the fact that our dear Ralph was with us. He's in town for a couple of weeks and the way he and Soph are looking at each other kind of sums up the reunion. She was pretending to be a dentist and she was taking care of him. Hooray for reunions.

That is the turkey under the foil and the most amazing buns ever, the homemade Pumpkin Focaccia buns! Hooray for a husband that cooks! (yes, we have an industrial stove - God loves Wade very, very much.)

the utilikiltarian

Last week when we were in Seattle we stopped in at the Utilikilt store to pick up Wade's winnings from the video contest he won.



We had a great time visiting with all the guys at the store and they treated us like rock stars. The editor newsletter, CJ, rolled out the red carpet for us and we discovered today that he had written about our visit in his newsletter.

Click on this link here to view what he wrote about us - it's pretty sweet (scroll all the way to the bottom) and make sure you click on all the underlined bits to view the full experience!

so, just to spell it out...

Just in case you missed it, in my last post when i said,

"Even though I say I think we've tried everything, I'd still love any encouragement or advice anyone has to offer....."

that was me, asking for some encouragement and advice.

(If you're praying for us, thanks, the last 24 hrs have been much better.)

another post already....

This morning Sophia and I were having a contest to see who was grumpier and no one was winning. Jennifer called right at the moment when I was losing it and invited us out for coffee. Time with her and Rebecca at a family-friendly cafe, time in the park, collecting gorgeous fall leaves were all therapy much needed for us both. We made art later.

It finally dawned on me, after saying to multiple friends, "I don't know what to do. Sophia keeps hurting Eleanor and nothing we are trying is working", that I could pray about this. I feel like an idiot to not have thought of it before. What a concept, huh? So, if you think of it, and you are reading this, could you please pray Sophia will stop hurting Ella? I think it is all about power, attention and drama, which are no strangers to my own personality - but I guess the fruits of the Holy Spirit will do the trick. I could use some of those too as I feel farther and farther from them every time I get SO mad Sophia has hurt Eleanor again. It makes me feel like a terrible Mum and just need some help... and we've tried it all, I think.


On the good side, they do (miraculously) adore each other and Eleanor looks at Soph like she hung the moon. (Thank God.) Sophia has taken to greeting Eleanor by saying "Hey Ella Bella, the cat and the fella, the cow jumped over the moon."

Photos taken by Nunuboo at a soap event we recently attended.

Even though I say I think we've tried everything, I'd still love any encouragement or advice anyone has to offer.....

William Tell Overture for Moms

This is funny.

moments of joy

I can't believe it's been 2 weeks since I posted last. I've had lots of good ideas for posts, but the time seems to never be enough for a deep outpouring of thoughts - so I think I will give an update of recent events.



Eleanor now has 2 teeth, is also very close to crawling, and today she made me laugh, really, laugh by laughing at me. She is sitting in the eating chair now (the mini high chair) and pounds down the food. She is super close to crawling, like to eat paper, and when she can, rips huge hand fulls of Sophia's hair out...payback.

Eleanor eats - and decorates with avocado.

We went to Seattle last week to see our friends and pay a pastoral visit of sorts to the YWAM crew there. It was a really rich time with lots of good connections. I felt like God was really in the timing of our visit and we all enjoyed ourselves. Sophia loves to play with our friend's kids, and we love hem all too, so it's win- win.


We spent Sunday cooking with our friend Zach, actually, he and Wade cooked, I ate. My favourite pic from the day is this one above of Zach and Eleanor. Eleanor's shirt is one that wade made for Soph when she was a baby. It has "Rage Against The Machine " lyrics on it, the front says "I was born to raise a fist against the system" and the back says "Yes, I know my enemy."

Phil and I eat the amazing pasta Wade made for us.

I'm well. I tend to be still trying to find a balance within my self most days of not stressing out over goals I set myself (and then feel I HAVE to keep, forgetting I can let myself off the hook), and just enjoying my kids. I wish I could remember every little thing they do and feel tempted to beat myself up about the fact that I can't seem to put any time into baby books or journals to catch every precious minute. Instead I have been trying to enjoy my moments with them more, so that when I look back I'll know the moments I can't remember were well spent - but I still yell at Sophia more than I would like. I still probably have a least one moment a day where I feel like a genius for handling a problem well, but those are interspersed with me acting like a 3 year old every now and then. Today I went for walk, something I have been meaning to do for literally months. It was pretty great, actually.

In grasping moments of joy a big, big one lately was being invited to a "animal pancake party" in Seattle. It was amazing! Our friend Heather's dad has a technique using turkey basters and squeeze bottles where he can create any animal you name and he was put to the test! I had a deer, Wade ordered a water buffalo, and others ordered manatees, lemurs, pterodactyls holding turtles - I think i loved the peacock the best - sorry no pic.)


Sophia had a zebra:

here's some others:


I think I'm gonna try it too....

big day!

Today was Sophia's first full day of preschool! She left this morning with her friend Rebecca.
She was stoked, I was a little emotional.


Sophia turned three and has just decided to be big. It is mildly disconcerting, but immediately, actually ON the day of her birthday, went on the big kid playground instead of the little kid playground. She was swinging on the bars she likes and said "Where are the big monkey bars?" I said, "Those are the big monkey bars." "No, the big ones." "Yes, those are them. They are not smaller, Soph. You grew!" And she laughs... She has, in fact, according to the doctor, grown 6 cm since April.

And then...has conquered the doctor, the dentist, learning to use the computer, ride a bike with training wheels, memorizing how to spell her own name, learn her numbers and letters, rearrange the things in her room and say things like, "Speaking of cheese..." and "I get the point."

I really like this big kid, but can someone tell me, didn't I just have a baby around here? Where did she go?

just thinking...

A thought has occurred to me as I attempt to encapsulate my day for this blog. I think motherhood of young children is partly so exhausting because I experience so many emotions in one day.

Just today I have experienced :annoyance, joy, pride, anger, awe, nervousness, relief, surprise, gratefulness, an uplift, a near breakdown, pettiness, stress and peace and I am sure I'm missing a few.

All that was before 8pm.

Oh, and Wade got me a new phone, it has a camera, an MP3 player and all sorts of things...but I was just aware that there was a time I would have dived right in to play with it all it does, and really I was just thinking..."When am I going to have time to figure that out?"
but, I also thought that I could take really cute pictures of the kids at the park...

Still looking for the joy.
Today I stopped and tried to think of 10 Beautiful Things while I did my ankle exercises and one of the things I attempted to find beauty in was how filthy my ceiling fan is because of all the dust, sun, fun and cooking of summer. It actually did make me feel better about it. It is atrocious.

playdate

Guess who's having a playdate at our house? Right now I am listening to Sophia and Rebecca talk. It is hysterical.

It's really fun that they are old enough to play together now. They're going to start going to Ms. Pam's preschool on Wednesdays together. As my sister and the BNF would say, good times, noodle salad.

our 10th anniversary party

What a day we had. On Saturday we celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary by renewing our vows and then partying it up with about 50 of our closest friends.



It was an absolutely lovely day. It was, as my friend Jennifer said afterwards, like a wedding with none of the stress. What surprised me, though (I know this may sound silly seeing as I helped PLAN the thing) was that it was just like a wedding. I knew we were having a party, but I hadn't really processed how much it would be another wedding and it was utterly overwhelming in a fabulous way. I never imagined it could be so great.

I loved wearing my original wedding dress, and was awed at the emotions it stirred in me to be a bride again. As I put my dress on, I was nervous, but couldn't figure why (I mean, I married the guy ONCE already), and then it dawned on me everyone was going to look at me say mushy deep things to Wade (which again, I know I do all the time when I teach, but...you know.) It is also strange when you are the bride you don't get to see everyone arrive one by one, you just walk in and suddenly people from every season of your life are in the same place at the same time, like a dream. This was really a good dream come true. While there were a lot of people who I would have loved to have had there, so many came that were such a surprise.



God totally blessed me and helped me find just what I wanted to say to Wade just when I needed to say it. He was so handsome, he was and still is better than I ever dreamed a man could be. He also looked really hot! (My dad loaned Wade his Cub Scout cuff links, which made me cry when I saw them. I also had flowers from my favourite flower shop, The Flower Box, which...yes, made me cry when I saw them.) My brother sang, and I really missed my sisters. I wore earrings from Caroline and carried my Pooh bear necklace from Liz ( you can see it in the photo above) with my bouquet to have a piece of them with me.



None of our original wedding party could be with us (but they ALL wanted to be - love you guys...) but our dearest friends nearby all stood up for us. (Jennifer is missing from this shot below - she was moving her car! - but when I get one with her I will post it too.) The guys all wore Utilikilts that Wade won with his Utilikilt prize winnings and we were all lookin' pretty fine.



My bridesmaids were INCREDIBLE. They were just what I always hoped bridesmaids could be, baking scones for breaky, painting my toes, buying jewellery, looking after my baby, driving and flower-wrangling and photo-taking and getting their own kids there all in one piece. And, when Sandra heard I had never had a fancy-schmancy wedding cake, she organized Angela and her friend Julie to help and they MADE THIS CAKE:



I KNOW! And this is me seeing the cake for the first time:



And then, to top it all off, Angela and Leigh managed to surprise us by arranging for all our friends to chip in to buy us a new laptop...and not just any one, but the best you can get. They gave us an empty box to open, and when all the $$$ arrives we will be getting the new model of the Mac Book Pro that will be released in October. I know! I know!



Wade was wearing Eleanor asleep in the sling when they gave it to us...needless to say, she woke up.



So I have spent the last 2 days processing all the bliss. God has been really speaking to me over the last year or so about waking up to my emotions, being awake for my own life and that if I numb myself to pain then I will also be numb when the joy comes around too.


I am so glad I was not numb to joy this day. It was so, so much goodness I have had to work to take it in. It is too much. It is the extravagance of God in all His goodness. There is no logic as to why I am so blessed , but I am grateful to God and all those I love and who worked so hard for making Saturday such an amazing celebration.



all photos copyright 2007 Sandra Vander Schaaf Photography

party!

What a great day we had today. It was Sophia's 3rd birthday party, and it was a fabulous time. I was reflecting out loud to Wade how much our friends just come along and help us pull off these huge crazy parties we throw ourselves into and it just works.

Maria who saved the day by grabbing the last minute things from the store, Hillary who stayed for an hour after doing all the dishes, Jennifer who bought sidewalk chalk and fabulous fruit skewers (both of which i really wanted), so many others who brought and helped...Angela who made the BEST CAKE EVER (TWICE!!!!) and of course, Sandra - who arrived early, picked up my Dad from the bus, made all the sandwiches, did all the party dishes beforehand and then took incredible photos that are not only beautiful, but with an eye for capturing the moments. This is the eye and the heart that loves and breaks so easily and I'm so glad she is devoted to me and mine and capturing our lives like no other...






Yes, this is a turtle. Another amazing, gentle, lovely, talented friend, Areli made this gorgeous little turtle who comes out of his shell. Sophia has named him Kookamunga Head. Kookamunga Head is currently tucked into bed with Sophia, and Areli is so good at knitting she has her own knitting blog, which you can check out here.




And...not only did Angela make this incredible cake, but she and Leigh found Sophia a bike and tricked it out with basket, tassels, stickers, princess gel seat and more so it is absolutely the coolest bike ever. And of course she had to have Dora helmet and knee pads and elbow pads too. Those of you who know them will recognize that it is not Wade and I behind Sophia in the photo as she gets on her first big girl bike, but very clearly Angie and Leigh behind her in the "ready to catch her" pose. That pretty much says everything you need to know about them. It's no wonder we love them.




While there were many people I wish could have joined us from around the world, I especially missed Ralph today. He has so much been a part of Soph's life that it was very wrong not to see him here, back and forth from Soph to Ari, joining in with the Jonathan Davies-instigated water fight...you may be pulling a latte for a London businessman today Ralph, but your spirit was here, just behind the blue swing...can't wait 'til April, when I will bring you a THREE year old flower girl and another one year old to charm.

P.S. The 'cheeky uncle of the day' award goes to the man who fed Eleanor a blue Twizzler. You know who you are.

lovey love love

Thanks so much to everyone who commented on my last post, it's nice to have been missed...I missed you too!

Last week the girls and I went to go see my Auntie Gill and Uncle Paul. We had such a good time with them. They are my godparents and with all of our parents out of town, have become surrogate grandparents to my girls. Now all of us love each other and have a great time. Here is my Auntie Gill with Eleanor:



But all of our affection for each other pales in comparison to what Sophia and my Uncle Paul have going on. They love each other so much that when they are together you can almost see little cartoon bluebirds of love twitterpating around their heads. I asked Sophia what she like best about our visit and she said, "Paul."

Here they are playing camping. The look on Sophia's face says it all:




We also went to the Aquarium with our friends. Adam was teaching Sophia how to throw coins in the fountain:



The great thing is that if she didn't like her throw Adam would reach in the fountain and her coin back so she could throw again!



Eleanor started eating solids. Here she is after an encounter with a banana in one of those suck-on-mushy-sacs:




And...Wade's sister got these matching sweaters for the girls. Sophia put hers on today and specially requested Eleanor be dressed in hers too and have their picture taken together.




Now I have thought a little bit about the matchy thing and I think I am a fan. (Come on, look at them!) I don't remember having anything matching with my sisters but I think I would have liked it. But I feel this may lead to some potential angst for some people...So, here's my question of the day. Matching clothes on siblings- yes or no? Let me know!