Pax Henry Hawk Pallister

I guess cliches are cliches are cliches because the are true, otherwise people wouldn't keep saying them over and over again. My poor third child, my only son, beloved Pax.

You have a first child, she gets her own blog. You have a second child, you change the name of the blog to include her too. You have a third child - under the age of 5 and the third gets a mid-post mention and when he's 10 months old you suddenly realize he has never had a post dedicated entirely to himself. Poor guy. (Then, on the eve of his first birthday, you realize that the blog post you started 2 months ago about him is still unfinished. Yikes.)

Pax. Paxy Paxy Puchu. The wacky peanut. The Dude. The buddy. Paxeroni and Cheese. Six Pax. Pax Man. The Peace Hawk.

When I think about Pax I get all dreamy. He is a dreamy dreamy dream boat of a baby. Ask anyone that knows him, he makes people swoon. Happy happy happy.

Let me start at the beginning. In October 2008 Wade and I went on a cruise. Now, we had really high hopes for this cruise, but unfortunately, I didn't realize exactly how badly my motion sickness had increased since having kids and I was sick as a dog almost all the time, it was truly truly awful. BUT it was fantastic to have some time alone with Wade and it was also the first time I'd had a quiet time in months and months. In fact I felt like God was chasing me down about this quiet time. When I finally listened to that nagging feeling to sit down with my journal and bible, I don't remember why I opened my bible to the Gospel of Luke, but what caught my attention was the story of John the Baptist's birth.

In the story, John's father Zechariah doesn't believe that he and his wife's advanced ages they'll be given a son, and he is struck dumb for his unbelief by the angel Gabriel. After his son is born, (Chapter 1 in verses 57-66) the family assumes he'll be named after Zechariah, but Z manages to communicate as he was divinely instructed that the baby's name is John.

And I felt in my spirit it was a story for us, about having a son. I don't know why, I just kind of knew. I also had a boy's name for years - Reading Asher Seven. And after this reading, I also knew that whoever the baby was that was coming, he wasn't Reading Asher Seven. He was somebody else. When I shared all this with Wade, he took it with his usual grain of salt, not-condescending-but-we'll-just-wait-and-see evenness that he always has - which is a lovely comforting thing now that my ego knows it for what it is, which is love.

Then in December we found out we were pregnant, and the day we found out, I went to to my journal to write it down and the last entry was the one had written on the cruise. (My focused quiet times with journal writing are not so frequent these days:) And as I re-read it, I had some goose bumps, because as I was reading it, Wade was sitting across the room from me preparing his sermon. Our church was going systematically through the gospel of Luke, and guess which verses Wade was preparing to teach on in church the very next day? Oh yes, yes it was. Luke 1: 57-66, the story of Zechariah regaining his voice and naming his son.

So, I thought we were going to have a son, and that his name would be different from the name we'd always had for a son. I wanted a name that meant "Peace" and presented Wade with a list, he immediately picked out Pax. Just like that. We liked that it sounded like a super hero's pseudonym, like Peter Parker. Pax Pallister, boy wonder. Henry is after Wade's Dad Hank and Hawk is after Wade's boyhood hero, Tony Hawk.

His birth was amazing, despite many last-minute concerns about my blood pressure and a possible induction, he wound up being born at home, in a lovely peaceful way. We're convinced that everybody is here now and that he's our last baby, and to be honest, I won't miss being pregnant, but I would love to be in labour and give birth one more time. It is just the most awesome thing I've ever done and it got easier each time for me. Pax was born in the caul, which means his water, or amniotic sac didn't break. the midwife had never seen anything like it, he came out in a little bubble, like a spaceman. She just kept saying, "Oh lucky baby! Lucky lucky baby!" It was great.

And tomorrow he is one year old. Every year seems to go by more and more quickly, this one was speedier than the rest. I am still in awe of Pax. I still am in awe that I have a son, and that he is so good-natured and funny and that he just adores us all so much. He laughs so hard at Sophia and Eleanor, no matter how many times a day they maul him.

I can't wait to see more of who he'll be. Happy Birthday son, I love you!

a conversation

Lately we have been having some issues with spitting. The raspberry, the zrrbt, if you will, out of control. Tonight at dinner Sophia and Eleanor and I were talking about spitting, and I offered the information that in Singapore spitting was against the law. then I told them that chewing bubblegum was against the law.

Shock. Horror. They rarely get bubble gum and it is such a dear treat (Sophia recently triumphantly managed her first bubblegum bubble.)

Me: Really, in Singapore, if you chew gum, the police might come and put you in jail.

Eleanor: And then, if a policeman got me, you would come and take me away from him and then he would cry and cry.

Sophia: And, if you were in jail, you would need some sheep friends, and they would need to know how to weld! (I begin to laugh) A Close Shave! (referencing the jail break scene from the Wallace and Gromit film of that name.)

Eleanor: And then, you would take me away from the policeman and my leg would break and then you would have to glue my leg and put a band-aid on it and the policeman would cry and cry.

I thing that with the gum chewing and welding sheep and leg gluing, we'd be a hit in Singapore.

beach beauties

July 2009 English Bay

a year ago....

Yesterday was the one year anniversary of the day Wade cut off his dreads. He had been growing them for 7 years. He did it to raise money for our dear friend Sandra, creator of the dreads, godmother, doula, photographer, family to us. Sandra had been diagnosed with breast cancer and was both unable to lift her camera (and hence work) and her arms to do dreadlock maintenance.



We had a birthday party and a fundraiser for Sandra to help her cover her living expenses during treatment. We had hoped to raise a thousand dollars. The dreadlock auction alone raised $2845.00



Sophia refused to get rid of the dreadlocks. They are still in a plastic bag in her closet. I can't look at them, it grosses me out entirely.



My brother Matthew mc'ed the auction and did an incredible job. We were utterly, completely, entirely amazed at the response. Sandra is such an incredible person and her generosity and the good that it unleashed was overwhelming. All tolled, the fund raising came to just over $13,000.00. The story of Wade cutting his dreads for Sandra made the local news. We thought it was just a party and a haircut. By the grace and joy of God, it turned out to be much, much more.

This, friends, is what Oprah likes to call "the ugly cry".

Today, December 8th, is Sandra's birthday. I'm overflowing with gratitude (and tears) to be able to write these words: Today she is cancer-free. Happy Birthday sister-friend. I love you so.



Wade is more handsome than ever. He says except for his short time in Thailand this past summer he's been cold ever since. Good thing Sandra bought him a nice warm, scarf.

I CAN!

Today while getting Eleanor dressed she pulled out a whole stack of shirts. I said, "Eleanor, you only need one shirt."
E: "No, Mum, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5!"
M: "You can't wear five shirts Eleanor, how about two?"
E: "No, Mum, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5!"

Mum helps Eleanor tastefully layer 2 shirts.
E: "No, Mum, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5!"
M: "You can't wear five shirts Eleanor."
E: "I CAN!"
M: "You can't"
E: "I CAN!"

I then choose to walk away.

I was wrong actually, she can. Here she is wearing 7 shirts simultaneously...

...while triumphantly eating Hawkin's Cheezies.

She gets an idea in her head, and she sticks to it. Right now, it often vexes me, but I gotta say I really like that in a girl.

overheard conversations

Sophia's getting a run for her money in the hilarious quote department these days now that Eleanor is chatting fast and furious.

Overheard conversations:

Eleanor: "Give dat Fofie."
Sophia: "What's the magic word?"
Eleanor: "Abracadabra."

While drawing with new markers, Sophia shows off her reading skills...
Sophia: "This colour is called 'Hot Pink' ".
Eleanor: "It going to burn me?"
Soph reassured her it would not.

At preschool prayer time:
Eleanor: "Thank you God for Mama and Daddy and for Mama's boobies."
When her teacher (after recovering) asked why, she said "So Pax can eat and live."

Never to be outdone, today when playing with the new My Little Pony play house, Sophia noticed there was a desk with an office. She told Eleanor that her Little Pony was busy filing her taxes. She also asked me to take a movie of her the other day and, I quote "blog it on facebook." A child of the new millennium, indeed.

Pax has started smiling, and today at his six week check-up, weighed 13 lbs 10 oz. Today I laid him on the floor for some "tummy time". He is so relaxed he lifted his head twice and fell asleep in the middle of the floor. The dude abides.

it's your call

Okay folks, I'm now going to take a poll. Over the last two days Wade has worked back-to-back 12 hour shifts. Which of these things makes you most convinced I am just still getting the hang of parenting a newborn (who weighed 12 lbs 8 oz at his check up today!), a very active 2.5 year old and a 5 year old who hardly ever stops talking (for real, she had to hold her breath today to stop herself from talking.)

a) the girls' preschool teacher called and left a message sayng she was so sorry to have sent one of my girls home without their underwear yesterday, she hadn't realized they had gone to the bathroom and left some wet undies in there until after we went home. I had no idea one of them came home with no panties on.

b) tonight we went to get dinner from a drive-thru and I left without my food. I took the drinks and drove off and then Sophia said "we only got water?!" and started to cry. Pax and Eleanor were already crying, hence my already muddled brain. The lady at the drive thru looked HORRIFIED when I went back.

c) I just found the laundry money in the fridge.

Happy Birthday Sophia!

April 27, 2008

Today, August 26, 2009

I didn't mean to stop blogging, it just sort of happened...

But I'd like to re-commit to starting again, I looked through some old posts today and it's such a great journal of my life with my gorgeous kids. And speaking of kids, we've got another one... Pax Henry Hawk Pallister was born August 12, 2009 and he's a dream.

I'll be posting more about him and our lives these days soon, but for now - this... this little blog started as a celebration of all things Sophia, so here's a shout out to her. In 29 minutes it will be exactly 5 years (August 27 2004, 12:01 am) since this gorgeous child came into the world. She is such a gift to us, and is really coming into her own as a big sister, a big kid, a really enjoyable person too.

Today she put on a dress she was given for her 3rd birthday that was too big for her at the time... I remembered taking a picture of her wearing the dress last year against our kitchen wall and thought I'd take another picture in the same dress in the same spot today to see how she's grown in the last year... can you believe the difference in 16 months? No wonder we think she's getting taller in front of our eyes... because she is.

Happy Birthday Sophia, we love you!!!!

vocab & other bigness.

Yesterday Sophia said:

"I have to get some more resources for my goldfish's room." and

"Look at the new technique I'm trying."

Yep, still 4 1/2.

And Eleanor went pee and poo on the potty. 3rd time for pee, 1st time for the poo. Oh happy day, I may not have 2 kids in diapers at the same time come August.... oh, can I dare hope?

She is now two, and officially fancy. Will publish some b-day pics when our camera cord returns from it's current journeys.

BUT WAIT... there's more (added Feb 25)

Yesterday Sophia got a paper cut, but after getting a band-aid for it, demonstrated by miming in the air how good it was that the injury would not effect her ability to work the remote to the DVD player. I was unable to hide my amusement.

And then... we were on our way home and we saw a flock of birds flying overhead, and she said,

"Every night, at sunset, all the birds gather at a restaurant to celebrate the day I was born." We were suitably impressed.

time for bed

This book was one of the first that Sophia was ever given, Time For Bed, by Mem Fox. It is so beautiful. It was a gift from our dear friend Sandra, and I highly recommend it.

Last night Sophia read a whole page in the book all by herself. It said:

"It's time to sleep, little bee, little bee. Yes, I love you and you love me."

It was so exciting. I hugged her and she said, "I really am getting ready for kindergarten!"

25 things.

There has been a bit of a trend amongst my friends on facebook lately to do these "25 things" lists. Normally I wouldn't bother, as my computer time is so much grabbed in tiny increments these days, but I so enjoyed some of the things I learned about really dear friends I spent a chunk of my Sunday working on this (took 3 or four sittings!)

The only trouble with me doing a "list" is, as my friend Jamie Arpin-Ricci once said about me, I am not a sentence communicator, or a paragraph communicator, but a chapter communicator. So, here goes.

1. I was born in Medicine Hat, Alberta, but my parents moved from there when I was a baby, so I don’t remember it. However, even though I am quite good at spelling, I still panic when I have to spell the place I was born on any official form and almost always spell it with “e”s where the “i” should be. I even had to use spell check for this sentence. (I got it wrong. Again.)

2. I have an older brother and 2 younger sisters (Matthew, Elizabeth and Caroline) who I am very close to in age and love a lot. When we were little we wanted to repel down the side of something, like mountain climbers on their way down a rock face, so we tied a rope to my brother's closet bar and threw it out his second story window and took turns scaling down the side of our house with his friends. My Mum was only alerted after she became aware something was wrong when we all ran up the stairs. And then ran up the stairs. And then ran up the stairs. The closet bar was really bent.

3. I like my feet.

4. During my YWAM DTS and SOMD I spent more time with my pal Barry Houser than I did with my husband. Not out of anything untoward, only because Wade didn’t do DTS with me, only our outreach. (He was doing “errands” and “maintenance” with Phil.) I still really like that YWAM is a place were a Canadian Catholic clothing-store manager and a gun-owning Mennonite truck driver from Pennsylvania could become the best of friends.

5. I have several ‘before-I-die’ destinations. The Grand Canyon at sunset. (Okay, I seriously just started to cry when I typed that. Weird.) A Cirque Du Soliel performance; to go anywhere in South East Asia; to visit many friends in Australia; and pretty much all of continental Europe, especially Switzerland and a vineyard in either France or Italy where I have been befriended by the owners and they have invited my family in and they are feeding us a very long, beautiful supper with lots of wine and food of indescribable simultaneous simplicity and complexity of flavour.

6. Once, at a life changing meal in Spain with lots of wine and food of indescribable simultaneous simplicity and complexity of flavour, I was so happy and amazed, that by the end I declared if I tasted anything else that was good, I would surely cry. At which point, my dear friend Mike Davies, one never to deny a challenge, insisted I taste his liqueur. I did indeed weep with joy.

7. My friend and adopted sister Sandra, so inhabited the above story (#6 ) when I told it to her, that later on she was confused as to whether or not she had actually been at the dinner. People like that are like oxygen to me.

8. I can tie the stem of a maraschino cherry in a knot with my tongue.

9. My first concert was En Vogue and MC Hammer, 1990. Oh, no it wasn’t - it was the Beach Boys, with my Dad in 1985. (I was 12.) We rode our bikes. I was confused by the the funny smelling cigarettes.

10. My favourite concerts were, Peter Gabriel - the “Us” tour, with Jan; and seeing Coldplay for $10 with Dave Laird, Heidi Sand, Ange, Vern and Ralph before most people in Canada had ever heard of them.

11. The people who were with me during the most embarrassing moment in my life, which I did actually have a nightmare about afterward, are all tagged in my facebook note. If you're not sure of it's you, it probably wasn't you.

12. Pretty much every time I hear the opening bars of “Misty Mountain Hop” by Led Zeppelin, I think it is the perfect song to be playing right then.

13. I once yelled at a large airplane full of people. There were these old dears behind me from Australia and they were really panicked about missing their flight and I had totally become to sympathetic to them by hearing them talk. So we landed and the the steward asked everyone to remain seated so the old dears could get off first and people waited about 30 seconds (of course) and then stood up and the old dears were only about four rows up and they were panicking and I couldn’t take it. So I yelled at everyone to sit down. Everyone did, and remained seated until after the old dears were long gone - until one man looked at me and said “Can we get up now?”. I was mortified at the time, but now I’m so proud of me.

14. When I was young, I memorized the entire soundtrack to the movie “Annie” and remember singing as I was walking down the road, secretly hoping someone would discover me and make me famous. I also had an elaborate fantasy about being on the TV show “Kids Are People Too” because I had been selected to be the child star of the next Star Wars film (this was before “Jedi” came out) and in the movie, (and on the show) I could do karate.

15. I am quite a good cook, but almost every time I make a sauce, I ask my husband, who is an amazing cook, to tweak it. He almost always adds brown sugar, or vinegar, or both, no matter what kind of sauce it is.

16. I spent very long hours in front of the mirror as a child developing the ability to make my tongue into the shape of a three leafed clover and to avert my eyes to one side, then cross them, then switch them to the other side.

17. My maiden name is Payne. The family history is that my great-grandfather’s last name was Barrington, but he died in the war leaving my great-grandmother pregnant and unmarried, so we bear her maiden name, not his. My sisters and I thought Barrington was a far classier name and used to pretend we were high powered business executives with our office, Barrington Inc. My sister Lizzy was Cassandra Barrington and I was Antonia (aka Toni) Barrington.

18. I am kind of obsessed with the Oscars. I started watching it with my Mum when I was a kid, who you used to explain to me the politics behind the votes. My best friend Lee-Anne and I have watched it together for years, even though she moved to Calgary over 9 years ago. We take notes and compare fave moments. We have special snacks (pringles and cream soda) and we take it very seriously. No matter how old I get I can not resist doing fake Oscar speeches afterward. I can not believe I just found out my friend Jessica has been to the Oscars 10 times!!!!! Not fair.

19. I’ve been married for 11 1/2 years to Wade who is so amazing, and I love him more all the time, and the longer I’m married to him the more grateful and amazed I am at having a good marriage with someone who loves me so well.

20. In college I was a theatre major, and hung out at a blues bar a lot, where a lot of friends who were musicians played and live blues music still makes me really happy, which is not really the point of the blues, but I’m just generally a pretty happy person.

21. I love surprises but have had very few in my life. I had one surprise party once, but I was sick and it was pretty mellow so I actually almost forgot about it. Once my sister Lizzy and her friend Sarah surprised me when I lived in California. And once my friend Houser came (on his honeymoon!) and showed up on my doorstep and really, really surprised me, because he promised a long time before he would do it one day. And he did.

22. My middle name is Helen, my Mum’s first name. Eleanor is named in honour of her and my grandmother, Ellen.

23. I love, love, love to go to the movies. I don’t go very often since we’ve had kids. To me there is something so special about going and sitting in the dark with all these strangers and you all go on a journey together and there is popcorn and soda and red Twizzlers and you just escape everything for 2 hours. Watching a video is not even close.

24. When my friend Jan or my Mum make me tea and toast they get it right every time, and it is difficult to explain how perfect it is. One time my niece Kelsi said, “Granny makes the best toast.” and as silly as it sounded, she is right.

25. My favourite colour is robin’s egg blue.

look at this

This is Sophia wearing button and zip pants. She used to be afraid of button and zip pants because they bugged her. Now, not only is she wearing them, but today she did up the button and zip all by herself. I know. Stand back.

She has been watching a video from the library called "Get Ready For Kindergarten" where they teach you to tie a bow for your shoes. She has been getting the cross over part, but she hasn't gotten to the bow tying yet. (You know, where you cross the bunny ears.) Today she was pretending to tie this bow, which her dad helped her with. I'll keep you posted on her progress.

lately

Lately we have...

...gone to Wade's Mum's wedding in AB. It went pretty well. We love spending time with W's brother and sister and their families, and seeing our good friends the Alexanders. I also saw my friends Tannis and Kim and it was so amazing to see them again after 9 years! Wade and his brother walked his Mom down the aisle. They were very good at it. Handsome, too.



... registered Sophia for school. (Here's Nori in front.) We are still wanting to do home schooling, and have found a program we are really excited about at a local elementary school. Soph will go in September (yes, she'll be 5!) and go 2 days a week for specialty and group subjects - this term the kids there are doing art, gymnastics, quilting, french and worm composting. How east van can you get? Then the resource teacher helps us develop a curriculum for what we want to do at home the other 3 days and we get some funding for that too. I feel way better about the fact that we have figured what we'll do since our baby is due a week before Soph turns 5....






... celebrate our friend Jacqui's birthday. Yay for Jax, and a reason to have a tea party.




... wash Eleanor's hair. She keeps putting stuff in it. Like a purple stamp pad, which coloured her whole face and left these cool punk rock purple streaks in her hair for a couple days, and whipping cream, as this video shows.

..think about getting Sophia an agent. This what she was doing a lunch for Wade and I today and I offered to take a video of her. This the kind of stuff she comes up with on a regular basis. Love that kid.

happy new year!

I can't believe it's been over a month since I last posted! December was absolutely crazy busy for us, but in lots of great ways.

Here's some of what's been happening:

~ The fundraiser we did for our friend Sandra was an overwhelming success. Wade's dreadlock auction raised over $2800 and the whole event and subsequent gifts came to over $13,000. We were all totally overwhelmed. It wasn't just the money, but also how moved people were by the action of Wade giving up his hair and us throwing the party. It seemed like there was a holiness to the whole thing that people from all different parts of our lives were aware of, whether or not they seem to have much interaction with God on a regular basis . We thought we were throwing a party and getting a haircut, but it just expanded. We were even on the news!

~ Wade preached at church and played with his band there too, cooked a turkey for the church dinner, had 2 very successful Christmas craft fairs ( I worked one which was fun.) We taught on the YWAM DTS for a week, said good bye to our DTS billet Peter and got ready for Xmas with my parents. We also had some sort of Christmas party or event every day from the Tuesday - Sunday the week we taught, the week before Xmas - whew!

~ We found out that we're having another baby in August of 2009! I also found out that on your 3rd pregnancy your body decides you need a belly way faster than the 1st and second time - I'm only 8 weeks, but my button and zip pants are already to tight - hooray for elastic waistbands! We're all pretty thrilled. Sophia and I think maybe we'll have a boy, Wade's pulling for his third girl (of course we don't really care, as long as it's a baby). If we can, we'll have another home birth, we so loved how peaceful and normal and lovely our home birth with Eleanor was.

~ We had a great Christmas, quiet, with only my folks and then Sandra came for dinner. I was really so excited to give this Xmas - I surprised Wade with an Ipod touch, and made robes for both our girls. I got lots of lovely things too. Sadly, I felt (and still feel) nauseous almost all the time, so every time I look at any Christmas decor or think about snow I feel pukey - I'm so glad to be in California right now...

~ Oh, yeah - right now we're in California. We came for our dear friend Ralph's wedding to the lovely Katie. Ralph lived with us for a long time, from when Soph was a baby til she was 2. We have known Katie for years too, and it was an amazing day yesterday. Sophia was the most excited flower girl you ever saw, Wade was a dashing kilted groomsman, I did a reading by Keats, and Rachel did a reading from Romans. It was very relaxed and fun and California-y. And Ralph did very well, having all those people look at him for such a long period of time - and he danced, in public, and to our knowledge he was not under the influence of anything except loooove.

I have managed to lose my camera, but the excellent Tim Farmer made sure he was taking lots of pics for all of us, (especially you, Ange!) so I'm sure as soon as he and Rachel get off the plane after their day of flying today they'll be passing those on ASAP!

Speaking of Rachel and Tim, they met us off the plane and we spent New Year's Eve together talking, eating snacks and just getting to know Tim and catching up with Rachel. Rachel and Tim are SO well suited to each other. We just fell in love with Tim and seeing him and Rachel together was so lovely. They are so in love and so comfortable together and just their body language even sitting next to each other is great. I loved just watching them, and they both got on with our girls so well, it was so hard to say goodbye again yesterday!

New Year's Day Emily and Josh came down to the house where we are staying and spent the day with us and Rach and Tim too. Sophia decided everyone needed to do princess art class and had everyone all around the table drawing for ages and ages. Wade made an incredible pasta meal, and we played Cranium and talked and laughed and laughed and laughed. Because, as anyone who knows Rachel knows, when Rachel is there, everyone feels like they are the funniest person in the world, because she has the most continuous, spontaneous, genuine laugh in the world (as far as my research has shown.)

Also, Josh is just funny all the time and Emily was just perfect Emily - so great, and so normal to be with her, with everyone actually, even after such a long time. Emily's photography is also getting more and more amazing. You should check out her website www.halflightimages.com. She took these pics of our girls, great shots that capture their personalities well.

Well that about wraps it up - we'll be here for another few days and then in a week and a half we're off to Wade's Moms wedding in Alberta - but more on that later - in the mean time...

Happy New Year!

Sophia bowing after performing "The Tired Boy and the Lullaby Mermaid" an original work
by Sophia J.J. Pallister and P. Wade Pallister.
Image Copyright 2009 HalfLight Images

A classic Nori face.
Image copyright 2009 HalfLight Images

big news

I have some news. Wade has decided to cut off his dreadlocks. Yep. You read that right.

And here is why. He thinks it's time. He's pretty proud to be almost forty with that much hair. They're heavy and they drag on the floor when he works concerts. But really, the reason is Sandra.

Sandra is our dear, dear friend. Godmother to Eleanor, doula to both girl's births, permanent dinner guest, family photographer, only one of 2 non-blood-family members to have a soap dedicated to them, and dreadlock technician. Yes, Sandra made those dreads on Wade's head in 2001 and has maintained what she and Wade think of as "their hair" faithfully ever since, up until the last year.

Sandra, you see, has breast cancer, and she can't lift her arms to do the dread maintenance any more. She is also unable to work as a photographer now, her mainstay for income, and so we are throwing her a birthday party that is also a fundraiser next Sunday night.

And, at the party, Wade is going to auction off the right to cut off each one of all 45 dreadlocks to raise money for the woman who brought those babies into being.

You can buy a dreadlock, the minimum bid is $20 a dread, more if you like. If we sell them all at a minimum bid, it would bring San $900 but I think my baby has at least a $1000 head of hair, so spread the word.

To buy a dread, come to the party with cash in hand. Or if you can't come or are not in Vancouver, go to the website www.happybirthdaysandra.wordpress.com. and click on "Donate", then send Wade or I a note saying that your donation is to buy a dread.

Sandra is nearing the end of her radiation treatments and is doing well, but would still appreciate your thoughts and prayers for quick healing and energy, especially to enjoy her own party.

Thanks for all your love and care for us and for her.

sermon

When I wrote last week about our day in emergency with Eleanor, I mentioned that I was meant to have spent that day preparing a sermon. My topic was the passage in Acts 28 where Paul was bitten by a snake and the islanders think he will be poisoned and then he lives. I wound up taking about the way our words can be life or poison.

It did come together well in the end, and my church has our sermons available online, so if you'd like to listen to it you can. It is in two parts and in part one my mic goes out for a bit but comes back. Part one here. Part two here. If that doesn't work, go here.

I just listened to it and it's always weird to listen to yourself, but good. I like knowing what I said. I am so wired when I start talking that I talk really fast. I also apparently say "you know?" and "um" a lot more than I thought I did. I also sound like my friend Jan. Which is good.

Enjoy. :)

stu and jacqui's (vancouver) wedding

Last month our good friends Stu and Jacqui celebrated their wedding here in Vancouver. They were married officially in September, and then celebrated in Australia and finally came back to their (adopted) home city of Vancouver. They had asked our girls to be their flower girls, but we felt that it wasn't right for us to do the trip to Salt Lake in September, though that was really hard to be away from them. So their celebration in Vancouver was especially sweet for us to bless them and celebrate with them.

They really honoured us by allowing Sophia and Nori to be their Vancouver flower girls and asked Wade and I to walk in ahead of them and introduce them. Wade and I (and now the girls) have referred to ourselves as Team Pallister for a long time and we were really thrilled to introduce Team Bishop. (They even have that engraved on the inside of their wedding rings!)

It was such a special day and here are some pics taken by our friend Mark.

This is an unbelievably accurate representation of Eleanor's personality. She has entered the church to do her flower girl walk and has decided that instead ripping the reserved sign off of the pew is the thing to do.


This is the scenario we used to describe our girls to new people we met the next week after the ceremony: Nori has decided that swinging off the reserved ropes on the pews is so much more fun than doing a flower girl walk - flowers are on the floor now. Sophia is entirely focused on her flower girl form, and walking so seriously and taking all her duties so deeply to heart.


Sophia dancing at the front of the church during worship.


Our dear friend Joseph left this blanket as a gift for Jacqui and Stu, and we felt like we were supposed to bless them as a mother and a father of the nation of Canada. It was good. The inner Frank Naea came out in me... if you know what that means, you'll know what that means.



Stu is kind of love with Eleanor. He reckons this is photographic evidence of her stealing his soul.


What is strange is that we hardly ever have pictures taken of all four of us. So nice to have this. See how I planned the little bits of green in our all our outfits? I love stuff like this.



These two have been such, such a gift to us this year. They give us joy like this often.



No idea what I am saying here, but I am apparently still funny.




Stu and Jax figured Soph needed a new Aussie soccer shirt, 'cause the one Leigh and Ange gave her when she was 2 is getting a little small. As you can see, she thinks it's pretty rock and roll, but that's mainly because of the seeds Uncle Leigh has planted.



All photos copyright 2008 Mark Bergshoeff. Not to be used without permission.

today

I would be wise to go to bed, but still wound up and writing will help. I began today by going to our DTS girl's small group. It was a really good conversation, and my phone rang towards the end. It was Wade, and I answered by saying - "I'm still in the middle of small group." He quickly responded, "I need you to tell me how much Eleanor weighs right now, I have poison control on the other line. She got into the bottle of Dramamine." Oh. God. The bottle I dropped in the pile of stuff in the living room while running to the bathroom and I forgot.

Oh. God.

Told him. Small group prayed. Wade called back. There were 12 tablets in the bottle how many did I take on the cruise (adult motion sickness meds)? I don't know for sure. She may have only had 1, but it could be as many as 2 or maybe even 3, and if she has had three she's in danger. Wade asks Soph - how many did she eat? TEN! No, no. He feels stupid. he was just shaving. I feel stupid. How could I? No,no... My friend Krista sprang into action, and came with, giving us her car, taking Soph, our school director Mark waved her out the door, go, just go. Lunch for Soph? We'll take care of her, just go.

So off we go, Nori seems fine - we're whisked in to a room immediately at emerg at Children's Hospital, poison control has called ahead - what a way to skip a huge line. Heart monitors, respiratory monitors, pulse monitors on her little toe. And what do you have to take to counteract this drug? Charcoal. For real. Charcoal. And we either have to get her to drink it, or it goes into through a tube in her nose. We add chocolate milk, I add more and more, trying to get her to drink through a straw. She does at first, gags, refuses. I add more chocolate milk, later cursing the volume she now needs to imbibe to get it all in.

Wade and I discover that Eleanor's determination does come from us, we are actually more determined than her. We are determined not to watch her have a tube up her nose to get this stuff in her, and we tag team, me holding her, Wade putting the bottle up to her lips. We finally reach success by allowing her to nurse for a count of ten, and then count as we get her to drink the "black milk". We count. We count like Dora, Wade yelling "Uno, dos, tres." We sing Blue's Clues, and Wiggles. It takes forever. It takes an hour. There's black everywhere. We all have gowns on, and there is black charcoal spit everywhere, on my glasses, in Nori's ears, on her neck, under her fingernails, on my new green tights. We blacken and blacken a half a dozen face cloths. I become convinced this is the parental equivalent of having to write lines as a child. "I will not leave medicine where my child can reach it. I will not leave medicine where my child can reach it." At times we laugh she looks like something from one of Rick's hilariously terrible MST3K movies "The Baby From The Black Lagoon." But once, when she was so weary, I just had to turn my face so she wouldn't see me cry.

The baby from the black lagoon is so tired....

And then, we're done. It seemed like the bottle was never going down, she would drink and drink and it looked the same, but finally, there is about an inch or so left of the 300 mls and Eleanor is so exhausted she is falling asleep between sips, and I say, "We're done." I am not doing this any more. She most likely only had one or two tabs, not 3, and I am all for being safe, but I. am. not. doing. this. to my baby any more. Wade makes the last inch of the trusty, fantastic, horrible stuff disappear down the sink. I confess later to the nurse but she doesn't get it and just sees the empty bottle and commends us. I absolutely take the praise, we earned it.

They need to keep watching her, and just when I get her to settle a new nurse comes on shift - then she finally falls asleep and they've ordered an EKG. I reluctantly wake my warm sleeping girl (I am totally convinced she's fine by this point) and the EKG technician soothes her by singing a lullaby to her in Romanian about an elephant. The staff were all amazing. Poor Nori never got back to sleep and thankfully a "Child Life" staff person comes to the rescue with books, a DVD and some bubbles. Nori was not thrilled about being taped to all the monitors, so we were getting a bit desperate as to how to keep her still for an hour.

Eleanor is fine, so fine. Poison control finally signs off on saying she can be released in an hour. Nori is asleep within minutes of being in the car - we're all exhausted, new fans of BC Children's Hospital and Poison Control hotlines, not such big fans of the makers of the child proof caps on the Dramamine (was it on right? i think not... stupid me...)

We get Soph, she has spent the day in total happiness, taking pictures of herself with Krista, composing new songs and dances to Uncle Stu's guitar. When she gets home she changes into an entirely beige "explorer" outfit to match the new home-made binoculars she and Wade just crafted from two toilet roils and a cork, and wants to hear all the dramatic moments of the day, imagining how cute Eleanor was in all of them. We try to explain the dreariness of it all. She mentions she'd like to take a lot of medicine so she could read books, watch a DVD and have bubbles. I barely control myself, but manage well. I have promised her bubbles to never eat medicine.

I was supposed to write my sermon today for Sunday. Not sure where I'll fit it in now. It is on the chapter in Acts where Paul is bitten by a snake in a pile of kindling and all the natives think he'll die from the poison but he lives so they think he's a God. For real.

Lord, thank you. Lord help us.....

this is a good one

The girls are in bed asleep. The last three nights Eleanor has slept through the night. It is amazing what kind of perspective you can get on your child waking up at 5:30 am when she has hardly slept at all the night before... and it was the day after daylight savings - so I counted it as if it was 6:30 am... and today they "slept in" until 6:10 am - whoot! Thanks so much to those of you who thought of her and prayed for us or sent your sleepy vibes our way. We are much refreshed.

This past month has been an extreme emotional roller coaster, from some of the worst days I've had in recent memory to definitely some of the best. Speaking of some of the best days, here's some pics from our cruise.

At the "captain's reception", the formal night on our cruise.

The view of "Los Arcos" in Cabo San Lucas, from the ship.

Me at the taco place that Wade researched in "Lonely Planet" that we totally trekked into the locals only area to find. It was next to a Mexican construction sight and it was awesome. I seriously do not know why I EVER doubt that guy, for real.

Dressed up for dinner. You can tell how relaxed we were by the fact that we had time and energy to stop and take pictures of ourselves in the mirror. Sigh. Sweet life.

As far as the worst goes, I am feeling better about a number of things, I got some new perspective recently. I had become bogged down by a lot of relational stuff going on, and by some drama in our neighbourhood. Then on Sunday, our pastor shared a bit about the legacy we leave behind us, and shared this clip of Bono receiving an award from the NAACP. I started thinking about how differently I felt about the things I'd been struggling with when I thought about them from the perspective of what I'm willing to suffer for myself vs. what I'm willing to put up with if I know it will leave a better world, legacy, attitude or neighbourhood for my kids. I would rather not have conflict with anyone, ever. I hate it. But I'll fight a hell of a lot for Sophia and Eleanor. They rock.

Speaking of how much they rock, when we were on our way home from Alberta, Sophia was noticing the signs at airport security with all the "do not" symbols and began to "read" the sign that had various weapons, liquids, and a skull-and-crossbones poison symbol crossed out. She said, "That sign says, 'No lotion, no knives, no guns, no pirates.' " Yep, we agreed, no pirates. Darn good thing. If I'd had all my new perspective, they'd have been some sorry-ass pirates for sure.