grace

Last night we had the worst night's sleep I can remember having in ages. The girls took turns waking up. Sophia woke up around 4 am and never went back to sleep. Yep, you read that right. Wade usually snuggles her if she wakes up at night and I was trying to do that and Eleanor woke up too and we never really recovered.

I had a meeting I needed to attend and by 6 am I was freaking out, but I had revelation. I was kind of panicking because we were all so sick and tired and I was just thinking, "oh no, oh no, this will be awful." And then it struck me that God could actually help me through the day. Took that option. So I took good care of myself, made sure I showered and ate well at breakfast. Picked my battles with Soph. She was kind of a mess but I took it slow.

Now, I forgot all her snacks I had packed and she never ate breakfast, but I got us all to YWAM (where they were getting taken care of during the meeting) and Karen found leftover miniwheats in the cupboard for Sophia. The meeting I attended was an adventure and I was pleased to be a part of it. When I got back they were both asleep. I decided grocery shopping was ridiculous, opted for a yummy burrito and handmade chips on a bench in the park next to all the bocce ball playing Italian grandpas. Soph swung on a 'big girl swing' and was triumphant. (I ask her at bedtime every day what her favourite thing of each day was and that was today's.)

Now, when we got home, Soph pulled Eleanor off the couch by her feet on to the floor and Ella skinned her head on the mat. I tried to have a rest so I put Soph in her bed and she pooped in her diaper and then she put her hands in it and rubbed them all together and finger painted her blanket with it. Yep, you read that right too - can you believe it? I couldn't talk for a second I was so mad. She was so hysterically tired by 4:30 pm that i fed her at 5 and cracked a beer for myself at the same time. Cleanup was turning into full body temper tantrum, so I just skipped it. At bath time she said "Do you want to get in the bath with me?" and I said "Yes!" just to have a fun moment. I taught her how to get the squirty animals to spit water.

She was asleep by 6:45 PM and may wake up at 5 am but I don't care. Even though I lost it a couple of times today, I recovered really fast and it is a lovely, lovely evening and I don't feel shattered. The grace of God was ALL OVER ME today. Thank you Jesus. I really hope we sleep tonight.