dear uncle ben

Dear Uncle Ben,

How are you? We are doing great. Our Mum says she only likes to talk about all the nice things we do but today when we poured water all over the bedroom and crushed brownies into the sheets she sure screamed until Eleanor started blowing her kisses, and she told our Dad all about it too. But we didn't mind that much, we're cool. We miss you. How is Australia?

Ben arrives in Canada and heads immediately for the nearest Canada Dry and a maple glazed.

We sure loved it when you came to visit us. We liked it first when we picked you up from the airport and we got to go to the donut shop at bedtime. And we liked all the presents you bought us. We know more about Australian animals now than we do about Canadian ones thanks to all the educational sticker books and stuffed animals. Nobody else has an echidna!


We would like you to come back now, though please. First of all, no one lets us sit on the dangerous part of the stairs and look at the clouds with our legs hanging over the sides like you. Nori points at all the airplanes and makes her little airplane sign, no one calls her 'Sonic Boom" and pretends she's a super hero like you, and Sophia has no one who will be suckered into carrying her any more.


We miss you reading stories to us, and also letting us come in your room and jumping all over you. If you come back we promise we won't make you read any hard words at all.

Before they knew they were being photographed

After they knew they were being photographed.

Mummy went shopping with Eleanor to the Gap at Metrotown with the sweet gift card you left for her. Isn't her outfit cute? She's thinks she's so big. Well, it's bedtime for us, but just so you know we think about you all the time and when we say your name Eleanor still says "Ba! Ba!". In case you change your mind about getting married in Australia, we know a couple of really cute flower girls in Canada! We miss you Uncle Ben. Come back soon!


Lots of love from
Sophia & Eleanor

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

poetry

I was thinking today about the fact that I often post only the good things my kids say and do on this blog. I thought I should explain that the reason I started blogging was because I wanted to tell someone all the great things my kids do all the time. My kids are normal. I say the same things to them over and over again. They are just barely now starting to play together and mostly they make each other (and me) scream. But every day they do and say things that blow me away and I LOVE to talk about them. If you think I talk about them a lot, if you're around me, you should consider that I am restraining myself. Scary, isn't it? I have discovered though, that it is obnoxious to go on and on ad nauseum about your kids, and so I blog - because, if you didn't WANT to hear a story about my kids, why did you dial up this here Internet web page?

Eleanor has started to sign at a lightening fast pace. This should not be a surprise, as she does everything else fast. If we show her one sign once, she does it, repeats it back to us, in context, hours or even a day later with no other repetition. It is pretty cool. The other day, in passing, I showed her the sign for "coffee". Not that she was ordering any, just because. Then I was hanging out a day or two later watching her play and I had a travel mug of coffee with me and it had been sitting up on a fence for a half an hour, and she cruises up and starts signing away, and it took me a minute to figure out she was pointing at my mug and signing "coffee"! Must be her Dad's genetic code kicking in.

Sophia's poetic phrases have amazed me again today. We had a little girl's time during Eleanor's nap and I was painting her nails. I was telling her about how Wade and I saw the city at night last night and how much I loved the city and began to talk about how there are people who live in Vancouver who don't believe in God or Jesus and don't even know them. She was pretty stunned.

The conversation wound around to her praying and asking Jesus to come and live in her heart. That was pretty cool. I didn't grow up with that idea, of praying to ask Jesus in, and I don't think it's absolutely a required step on the journey, but it came about and she was so chilled about it, and taking it all in, it was nice. The conversation involved talking abut Jesus dying for our sins, you know, light chatter for manicure time. Later we were telling Wade about our talk and Sophia said,

"When Jesus died on the cross, my heart was broken, like this", she mimed with her fingers something coming apart, "Broken apart, like a baby chick. Then when Jesus died on the cross, He put my heart back together again, like this." And she joined all her fingers together again.
If I had made that comment up, I would have gone the traditional route, of the rising again being the part that put her heart together. But the dying broke it, like a baby chick, and the dying healed it.

She also composed an impromptu song last night about how her privates needed a wash. Poetry, baby, poetry.

what goes on in her head....

Today I was sitting at the kitchen table with the girls, working on the computer. There was a moment of silence, and then Sophia gave a heavy sigh.

"Well," she said, "I still haven't grown any hair under my arms yet."

campy camp camp and other news

We just got home from church camp tonight. We are tired, but we had such a good time. Our pastor (and friend) Gordie used 'Psalm 2' that Sophia wrote (below) to begin one of the sessions.

We hung out and ate lots and swam and it was so, so good for my city kids to run around in big open spaces. It was the first time that Sophia really had a buddy that she wanted to run all over with. She looked like such a big kid. She was brave - swinging high stuff, jumping into the pool, falling off the top of the monkey bars - yikes! Nori just cruises, whereever she goes, just cruises. You really have to chase after her all the time because she will just walk for miles.

It was more emotional for me than I expected, because camp last year was where my favourite recent memories were of my friend Renee, who died earlier this year. It was sad and lovely and good.

Wade DJ'ed a dance again this year. It rocked. He worked so hard on it - did visuals like on the Wake tour and crafted the perfect set list. Nori fell asleep in the sling and was so cute snoozing away with the thumping techno going on around her. Last year Renee and Wade danced until everyone else was gone - so yesterday when the dancing started i just had to have a little cry. I said this morning when I shared about Renee that when she died, people say at funerals we're celebrating their lives, but when Renee died, I wasn't really in a place to celebrate, only mourn. This weekend I got to celebrate. It did feel like she was there somehow, dancing, sitting on the beach, giving me her eye for great pictures.

We have an incredibly unique, supportive, broken, crazy, happy, lovely generous church family. We feel so loved and valued there. It's really not perfect, downright annoying sometimes, but I absolutely can't imagine us anywhere else.

I also got to start my day with a phone call with my friend Stuart. He married my friend Jacqui today over in Utah. It was so special to be able to talk to him, he was sitting with our dear mutual friend Joseph, waiting for his bride. I walked out of our cabin to try and get better reception on my phone and there was whole flock of Canada geese just hangin' out on the lawn. God's called Stu and Jacqui to be missionaries to Canada from their home nations, and I felt like it was a little salute for them, significant of how a flying V of geese will change leaders as they fly, to take turns leading, to allow the others to soar better - just like Jacqui and Stu. And technology blessed me again when the lovely birthday boy Mike D. sent me a picture on my phone of the couple smiling away, being presented to the world by Joseph himself. Don't anyone curse technology to me today - it filled me up.... and later on the geese were gone - they just wanted to say hi to Stu with me I guess.

Sophia has preschool again tomorrow and Wade has 3 days of roadie work now with Janet "Ms. Jackson if you're nasty." That is always a little tiring because he does so much with the girls it's hard when we have several days in a row where I am on kid duty alone. I have no idea how single Mums do it. We are really hoping to save up some money because in October Wade and I are going to San Diego for some YWAM meetings and we found a 4 day cruise that would work for us to go on with the dates we are there and it is only $400 a person! It would be our time without kids since July 2004! So... say a prayer we get all our finances in row for that, ok?
And we are also going to Alberta in October too - Wade's Mum has a serious beau ( I know!) who is flying us out there so all of his family can meet all Mum's kids and grandkids - a little strange but she is happy, happy happy, so we are too. My husband just hates Alberta so much... we REALLY need to pray we get on that cruise so he can get some October-in-Alberta healing after we're done.

And it looks like we are going to be a bit more involved in the upcoming DTS. It's a small school ( 9 students from 8 nations how exciting!) and we're going to billet students in our homes and take turns having them all over for meals. We'll have two guys living with us, so I'm praying for just the right guys who will LOOOOVE our kids. (And love living with them in very close quarters when they wake up SO early!) I may also be taking a one-on-one student for the first time since 2001... pretty fun - I think!

Thanks for reading..... see you soon.

Psalm 2

Yesterday Sophia sang me another Psalm.

This is the singing God
This is the singing God

There is no fear in God
God is very brave
God is taller than you, Mum
God is taller than me
God is taller than those clowns who walk on stilts
God is taller than the pickle in Dave and the Giant Pickle
(and did you know those soldiers who shot him were very very small?)

God has you in his heart
God has you in his heart
God has you in his heart

(I think the 'selah' line for me was "God is taller than those clowns who walk on stilts". Sandra thinks it is metaphorical those people who set themselves up to be bigger than God. Hmmmmm.)

guest appearance by.... the nephews

At my parents 40th anniversary blessing this summer - my sister Elizabeth and her kids couldn't come: L to R back row: My brother Matthew, Fr. Sean, Dad Bob, Mummy Helen, Brother in law Gary, Caroline, yours truly, Wade & Eleanor. Middle row: Caleb, Garet, Judah. Front row: Sarah, Jedidiah, Sophia.

My youngest sister Caroline is a great friend and a great Mum. She has 5 kids, (yes, 5 kids) and she and I often trade funny things our kids say, or sometimes even better, funny things we say to our kids. Some of the great things she has said include. "No, you can not eat my sandwich, you puked on yours." and "Stop choking yourself with the cord of those blinds and get in the car."

Today she sent me this email:

Caroline says, 'Okay kids, I am taking you to the Fall Fair Office to take your exhibits in today. Can you behave yourselves so we can get it done? It's very busy there. You know, listen, don't run around. Usually I get someone else to watch you while I do it but this year can we try doing it just us?'
Judah says,'If I disobey can I go to my friend's house?'(If my friend was watching them he'd be playing with his friends)

Caroline says,'Okay, what I'm really saying is if you run around and scream your heads off I'll keep all your fall fair money and spank you.'

Caleb says,'Excuse me Mom, but if we screamed our heads off then our head would be on the gravatron and our body would be on the ferris wheel at the same time.'

Garet says,'Mom, if we screamed our heads off, taking away our fall fair money wouldn't actually be a punishment because we'd already be dead!'

Caroline collapses in laughter.

sophia turns 4

Sophia will be turning 4 this Wednesday. (I know, 4! How did that happen?) We held her party yesterday and she informed me today that she actually 4 now because she blew out the candles yesterday. Fantastic. We had a lovely day, and our friend Sandra took some gorgeous pics as usual.* Enjoy!

Eleanor had her first hair cut yesterday morning before the party. Bangs trimmed. So big!

I got the idea to use cute wooden clips on goodie bags from the gorgeous photos of Ari & Noah's birthday! Thanks Heather!

Sandra's fave pic of the day.

Yeah, that's a rock so big it's taking Wade's eye out... yep. She was wearing it yesterday..... inquiring minds want to know, Pam!

The game below - I made the bean bags, Wade made the tossing board. It was a tea party theme, so you had to throw them in the cups.

Ange wanted to be there to make the cake, but Aus is long way to come, so we put her tea set on top of the cake instead!

* All photos (except birthday cake) copyright 2008 The Art Of Seeing Photography.
Not to be used without permission, please.

a song by Sophia

Today we did a devotional and afterwards we read a Psalm. Sophia remembered that I told her once the Psalms were songs. After I read it, she asked me to sing it, so I made up some music. Then she said, "Now I will sing a song", and this is what she sang:

I love you God
I love you God
I know that you love me the best.
Thank you for giving me perfect love.
I know that I am a princess of you.
Oh, I love you, youuuuuuuuu.
I love you!

For real.

hey hey

We're back. We had a week vacation in Vernon with our chosen family, the Wilsons and the Alexanders. We've known each other so long and the connections are so many that we just tell the kids "you're cousins". It was fun, fun, fun. Let's just say: beaches, deck, backyard pool, margaritas, cranium, mexican food, waterslides, more margaritas, thai food, orchards, peaches you have to eat over a sink, large amounts of '80's karaoke, greek food, some more margaritas, some more waterslides, some more karaoke.... sigh.

Here's Eleanor and I on the deck at the Wilson's house. By the way, I know I have shown on this blog pics of how much Eleanor looks like Wade, but check this out:

That's me on the right. (Sister Lizzy on the lft, brother Matt down front.) Eleanor-y, huh? Isn't that nuts how she can look so much like BOTH of us? Way to go, God.

P.S. How cool are my parents? This pic is taken in 1974. My Mum is actually wearing a polyester jumpsuit that would fetch a mint today, and my Dad's plaid slacks are amazing. I remember making him throw out the shirt, which was actually kind of sheer, in the '80s. I SO wish I had it now. It was awesome.

We moved Nori downstairs out of our room yesterday into Soph's room. She is exactly 18 months old as of yesterday. Wow. They did pretty well with the new set up. Wade was up 4 times in the night with them - power daddy. If you think of it, can you pray for a smooth transition? We moved S's toddler bed upstairs to our loft so she could have a 'quiet time spot', and we painted the bed. it looks great. Here's pic i took of her while we were painting:


And to continue with the theme of "isn't DNA a wacky thing" here's picture of my Mum and her little sister Trish taken some time in the early 1950's. My Mum is on the left. Fun!

fresh squeezed eleanor

Eleanor is 17 months old now. She is amazing. She is the loudest person I have ever met. She can scream so loud and so high it will silence a whole room of talking, do damage to our ears, make you think there is a screecher firework or a fan belt going off in your skull. We named her after a song with a lyric that says "You are the brightest gem you are the loudest yell." I always thought it was metaphorical, then she emerged.

Eleanor is fast. She can climb anything. Lift things most babies wouldn't attempt. We keep all the kitchen cupboards rubber banded together and if we accidentally leave one undone it will only be a matter of minutes (sometimes seconds) and she's there to open it and pillage what she can. We have to double bar our stairs with a gate inside a gate, as she can scale or go under a single one.

Eleanor likes to pretend she is going on trips with bags. She yells "BA!" (bye!) and will blow you kisses when she leaves the room. She pretends to have naps and does a hilarious pretend sleeping face, very serious. She says Mummy, Daddy, Cracker, baby, teddy, Matt, "Uh OH!" and adds more every day. Speaking of cheese. she will hold up a toy phone, point it at you and say "Cheese!" because phones take pictures now, didn't you know? She loves to talk on the phone. She just now took my phone and pretended to call Dora the Explorer ("Huh-oo? Da-doo?" then "Miaow!" and made the sign for Kitty, because Baby Jaguar was there too.) On Saturday she was holding a domino like a phone and was taking a call.

She really loves our friends Stu and Jacqui (who got engaged at our house last month) and likes to call their names, but was really confused when I got her to put on a jacket yesterday and was saying "Jacqui?" and I said "Jacket." and she said "Jacqui. Stu. Stu. Jacqui." but didn't seem to equate why they weren't there or why she had to wear her rain jacket.

As an aside, I love her rain jacket. I got it at superstore, the Joe Fresh line. I recently inquired with them as to their human rights practices and I was thrilled to get an answer that said:

"Our Joe Fresh Clothing is made in state-of-the-art factories around the world which are all ISO certified. We respect all local laws and ensure that factories are socially compliant. We have a zero-tolerance policy for child labor and forced labor and hold the highest standards for health and safety, and environmental compliance. We also employ third party firms to audit manufacturing facilities to ensure compliance."

How sweet is that? At least as sweet as this organic juicy peach we traded some soap for at the Farmer's Market.


That's some fresh squeezed sweet life right there.

wisdom

Greetings Friends

Apologies for the long silence. Did a 40 day Facebook fast in June and it inadvertently spilled over into blogland. We are well.

Have a Soph story to share with you.

A dear friend of ours has been diagnosed with cancer. (I 'm choosing not to say who because 1) this friend is tired of telling people the news and seeing what we've come to call "cancer face", and 2) this really is a story about Soph.)

We were on our way to see this friend today and I realized that Sophia (our sponge) had probably absorbed a bit about what was going on already from our conversations in the house. I explained that our friend was sick.

Soph: "Maybe if ______ is sick, when we see her, we shouldn't kiss her."
Me: "Oh no, sweetie. You can't actually catch cancer from someone. In fact, one of the best ways you can make cancer better is if you give someone a lot of kisses."

So when we arrived Sophia enthusiastically kissed and kissed and kissed our friend and small cells of poison ran shrieking for their lives.

We picked some raspberries in the sun and sat later eating our raspberries and cream, thinking Soph was oblivious to it all, when my friend began to outline her options for dealing with her business in the coming months.

"As I see it, I have 3 options. I could try and do everything myself. I could try and do none of it. Or I could ask for help." I had no time to respond. Sophia, confidently and breezily, on the end of a mouth of raspberries and cream, said "Oh, ask for help." We looked at each other, surprised she had even been tracking with the conversation. Our eyes started to glisten with tears as she continued without a pause. "Whenever I have a job that is too much for me to do, I ask for help. When my room is too messy and I can't do it all myself, I ask my Mum to help me. That's why my Mum just changed all my room around, so I could clean it better."

She was so confident, and assured that that was clearly the right thing to do. My friend told Sophia how wise she was. "That's what your name means", I told her, "Sophia is the greek word for wisdom." It felt like such a holy moment. The decision was really made by her words and strength of faith.

Nori was doing her part all along, of course, with her mad grins and ball chasing and stair climbing and raspberry eating and slobberiness and general joie-baby mayhem.

When we departed no one needed to remind Soph that kisses cure cancer. Kissed and kissed and kissed again. We are indeed rich.

sophia does her numbers

Sophia and Eleanor and I got back last night from a little trip to Victoria. We went to see my parents, my brother and my sister Caroline and her 5 kids. We had a really great time, going to the beach, the pool, the park and eating lots of ice cream. It is so much fun now that Sophia is old enough to remember her cousins. We dig vacation. Or as Wade likes to call it, Bacation, because you usually eat bacon.

I told you I would tell you later about my trip to Calgary - well, the nutshell is, I had fallen into a bit of rut in not taking super great care of myself - even little things like painting my nails... so I had a 3 day trip and I just did things like shopping, going for coffee, visiting with my friend and hanging out with my hilarious god-daughters. And I came home just more aware of how tense I'd been (not for any good reason), how much I just want to be a Mum and and to be a fun Mum and I'VE JUST BEEN MORE RELAXED. oops. caps are accidental, but I'll leave 'em. It was life-changing in the fact that my outlook is different now. And I'm so excited about summer with my girls. And I have taken to ironing my favourite shirts when the kids are in bed so they are ready to wear in the morning. Even if I don't pick one of them, I think, look at those nice ironed shirts, someone who really loves me did that for me - OH, it was ME! Way to go, me.

I was also in a space where I was able to encourage Wade to go on a little trip too, so last week he went to Seattle to eat meat, cook meat, talk about cooking and eating meat, smoke meat, talk about constructing apparatus' for cooking meat and also perhaps making beer and drinking beer. And he ate a really good pretzel and some Thai food too. And then more meat.
So for me, it takes, shopping, going for coffee, reading magazines, talking with friends, coffee & truffles, taking long baths while drinking apple cider & eating Haagen Dazs & listening to Nat King Cole, little more shopping, going for more coffee, seeing some theatre and eating some Thai food while more talking with friends - Wade, pretty much meat and alcohol. Hey, whatever works.

Today Sophia was watching kids CBC and Barenaked Ladies have a new kid's CD and they were singing a song about how 7 ate 9 ( 789, get it? Yeah Sophia explains it really well if you don't, with lots of hand gestures.) and Sophia decided she wanted to create numbers with her body. She started with 7 8 9 but then she needed Wade for the double digits. She's pretty smart, we think.

seven

eight

nine

ten

and for some reason, blogger is refusing to let me out a caption under the picture below, but i do have to point out Sophi's art direction to Wade that the number 11 was constructed of number 1's that were the type with an angle on top and feet on the bottom.

twelve, with a small 1 and 2.

and of course, number 13. we did admire Wade's "one" face.

Shileeah Cloeyzander

Sophia read for the first time today. She was pretending to have a dog named J.J., so I wrote a little story and taught her what a couple of the words were and she was able to read it.
"See J.J. run. Run J.J. run! I see J.J. run. J.J. runs. J.J. is dog. See a dog run."
What it lacks in plot was made up for by the excitement of the first read.

She still changes characters about 6 times a day, sometimes from TV and sometimes ones she made up. Today I loved the names she made up so much I wrote them down so I wouldn't forget them. She said that her name was Shileeah Cloeyzander, and that she had a little brother named Raddy and her Mom's name was Sizzler and her Dad's name was Chucky.
She apparently used to live in Australia where she would see Auntie Angee and Uncle Leigh and pet the kangaroos and koalas. When she lived there, one time Murray from the Wiggles loaned her his red guitar and she played in a concert in a stadium with them. She sang "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star." She did also fly in Uncle Ben's plane.

Super fun.

i got me some bangs too!

Last week I embarked on some much needed self-care. It all started the week before when my best friend Lee - Anne visited me and asked me the question, "So what are you doing in your life right now that has nothing to do with Wade or your kids?"

"ummmmm... sometimes I sew?"

So it started with a haircut and it was business as usual, and then I saw a woman with some new bangs (a fringe to those UK amongst you) and I thought my friend Heather taking the dive to bangs too. I haven't had bangs since 1993 when my goal was that they stand up like a wall.

I'll say more about the rest of the week later, but for now wanted to post a pic or two... I'm pretty thrilled with the new do, too!

i made this!

I have officially entered a blogging vortex, where so many things have happened in the last month I am paralyzed to blog about anything because there is so much to say. I even have another post half way done. BUT I decided to break the blog silence because I am looking for some oohs and ahhhs on my latest project. Sewing pretty things for my house is a happy place for me these days.

I found this in an alley.

Then I got some great fabric with the easter money my Mum sent the girls. It's called "Swinger Lollipop". Add the buttons from the original hamper in a different place and the ribbons from Auntie Angee's craft box and ....

wanna see something kind of funny?

The other day when i took the kids to the dentist (they were rock stars - Soph was SO big! In the chair all by herself! ) Eleanor went into the little plastic playhouse and stood in the doorway. Apparently it is the centre of the universe for static electricity.

Sophi and I laughed and laughed. Good times.

wanna see something kind of freaky?

Eleanor's passport picture.

Wade as a baby.

Sophia's passport picture. (The man told her she had to have her mouth closed.)

Me. (I don't know why I look like I am about 11 in this pic, but I like it.)

DNA baby. It's a wacky thing.

remembering renee

My friend Renee died. She had cancer and we never thought she would die, only get better. It was a total shock, and then, shocking again, Wade and I were asked to travel to Winnipeg the week before last to officiate at her funerals there. It was three of the hardest days of our lives. We were thrown in to duties we had never done before, but felt really carried and covered by prayer. We were also aware we were representing so, so many people who wanted to be there but could not. So we tried our best to speak on their behalf, on your behalf, and we greived on many people's behalf as well.

My friend Sandra, who is such a gifted writer, wrot a short note to me & Ange & Leigh the day after Renee died. She said:

I was praying for Renee through the day yesterday. The phrase that kept coming to me was “sweet life, sweet life, sweet life.” Cancer brought, without a doubt, a tragic end to a sweet life, altogether too short, but the sweetness of her testimony, her vision, her friendships, her life is not diminished. I pray for balm for your grieving soul. And I pray that you’ll be moved in some Spirit-inspired celebration of life’s sweetness to help you commemorate Renee’s life, where you are, in the full knowledge that your grief is shared, Renee’s memory is shared, God’s mercy is shared, and distance matters little in these things.

So when we finally laid Renee's body in the cold, cold ground in her home town, were we could see the yard where she grew up from the graveside, and I had to try and think of what to write on the side of her coffin, I just wrote; "Sweet life, sweet life, sweet life. Love you, Joanna... for so many." (Wade wrote "East Van - We miss you.")

And at the funerals, it was my job to share about Renee's time in YWAM and her faith. I wrote out my speech because I wanted be able to tell you just what I said, because the heart of speech came from so many of you. So here is (morphed together) the speech I gave at the two funeral services in Manitoba. I hope I did you all proud. I was my honour.

It is my tremendous privilege to speak to you today as someone who served with Renee at Youth With A Mission Vancouver.
Youth With A Mission, or YWAM, as we call it, is an international, interdenominational Christian missions organization, but for those of us who call ourselves “YWAM-ers”, it is much, much more than an organization. For many, it becomes our family, our tribe. Renee was family to us, and to many others.

I often say the very best and the very worst thing about YWAM is that you come together and build the some of the most amazing, deep friendships you have ever know, and then, because we’re missionaries, you say goodbye again and again as your friends go all over the world, being missionaries. The hope that we hang on to is that we always seem to see each other again in the most unexpected places, in fact, today is a unexpected, sad, and yet joyous reunion for the YWAM family that is here. We are all too used to goodbyes, but none of us was prepared to say goodbye to Renee in this life yet.

What is difficult is that many of those who love Renee, who served with her in YWAM, are indeed all over the world, grieving without a gathering like this to help them through, and I bear the privilege of speaking for them today a great honour, in the hope that they would know they don't grieve alone. Some of you may have seen the front page of the Winnipeg Free Press yesterday with Renee's picture on the cover. The headline read "Family's Grief Shared By World". I'm afraid they don't know the half of it.

Renee joined Youth With A Mission straight after high school, coming to Vancouver to participate in Discipleship Training School, a five month course the exposes and educates people about Christian missions. One of her leaders during that school, Rhonda Navoy Hunter, has reflected how we saw Renee grow form a girl to a woman in the time she was with us. Rhonda loved her quiet strength , and how selfless and thoughtful Renee was. She remarked on how fearless and willing she was to step out in obedience to God remembering how Renee shared the duty of preaching a sermon on outreach in asia, and how the pastor of the church was amazed at the confidence of this young girl to preach.

Our YWAM Vancouver Director, Mike Davies, and his wife Jennifer sent a message for you today:

“On behalf of Youth With A Mission Vancouver we would like to express our heartfelt sadness to the Dueck family and all that knew Renee, at the loss of this vibrant young woman.

We were honoured to have Renee with us in Vancouver as a co-worker, friend and for Jennifer and I, a house mate. She was an amazing help to us when our third child Rebecca came into the world.

Renee had a way of making all of our staff, old and new feel welcomed and of great worth, no matter what their experience or age. She was a very gifted young lady who touched the lives of many here in Vancouver, as I know she did wherever she travelled. She wrote and directed an amazing Easter production, "My Beloved" which was presented by our Staff which was designed to reach out to our local community. Her heart for the lost was evident and an inspiration to all of us.

She will be sorely missed by us all.

MIke and Jennifer Davies”

The play that Mike mentioned, “My Beloved”, has a special meaning to me personally, for I was asked to play the lead in the play, and role of Mary Magdalene. Renée's writing in that play changed my life. As I played the role that Renee had written, I felt like the bible story she interpreted was happening to me, in all it’s rawness, and vulnerability and joy. I have never seen Easter morning the same way since. I knew what Renee believed, because it was in her writing, in her work. She believed with all her heart that life was hard, and that at times it was excruciating. And she believed that Jesus was real, worth living for and worth dying for. And she believed, as she wrote in the play, that He was no ordinary man, but her King. I know her presence with Him now is her joy and her reward, and that the comfort that is available to each of us, through her precious Jesus, is real too. Renee would never have offered this hope as a platitude, or a band aid to anyone, but as a very real accessible help that she had experienced personally.

Renee’s friend Audrey from Texas wrote to say that Renee was probably one of the coolest people she had ever met. She said: “Renee knew who she was and followed through. She was creative and not afraid to try new things...i remember when she started to wear ties as belts...soon everyone was doing it.”

Several friends, Audrey, Lisa & Ben included, remember her great cooking - how much she loved to eat. Hannah wrote to say tat Renee was the first person who ever taught her how to stir fry anything without having it stick to the bottom of the pan! Audrey remembered she asked Renee once how she learned to cook an Renee just looked t her like “Duh! I just made it up! how she loved to take photos and how she loved, loved Vancouver and eating all the food you could get on Commercial Drive, our neighbourhood.

Renee was someone who brought joy to our YWAM family, she laughed a lot and was pretty funny herself. Ben is sure she is telling jokes to Jesus right about now. Her laugh was contagious. I loved it when she come and put her arm around me whenever she spoke to me, and she would always smile and laugh. She helped us make some really funny videos too, that we used as teaching tools for the youth in our programs, I’ve learned from her siblings that this is something Renee was doing long before she ever came to YWAM, her first one was when she was 11, that she and Justin wrote, starring Alayna and Kara too - so apparently lighting leprechauns on fire and ninjas leaping out of trees was not such a stretch for her.

Renee longed to motivate people to discover and follow their passions - to do something - anything, but especially if it had meaning, proclaimed truth and justice. Emily wrote from California and spoke for many when she said Renee was a very passionate person. She said: ”When I think of Renee the first thing that comes to my mind is picturing her during prayer times. She was a very passionate intercessor. When she prayed she prayed with faith and hope that what she was asking for would come about. Renee never left anyone out, she was kind to everyone and all were welcome when she was around. Renee was a fighter, when obstacles came up, she met them head on. She fought her way to go on outreach to Jordan, writing the play for Easter, and getting people together for creative projects on the Wave. She was constant, and loved the Lord, and will be greatly missed. I know she really made a difference in every life she knew, and I have a hard time thinking she's gone.”

It was on the Wave USA tour, a tour to challenge people to rise up to their passions and the call of God on their lives, that Renee was diagnosed with cancer the first time. On that tour was her friend Jacqui. Jacqui has been on a YWAM outreach in Asai, and returned to discver rnee had passed away. Her shock was immense, but she wrote to say: “. but when i think about it, being in the middle of my life with YWAM half way across the world is exactly what renee would be expecting me to do. it seems a little cheesy, but really ren loved the kingdom of God in all it's forms - especially expressed through nations, culture and people. that's what her faith was all about, and it inspires me to keep on going as a missionary because of her tenacious passion for these things. many of my greatest moments in missions have included renee. i remember being with her when she had the cambodian word for hope tatooed on her ankle - when i think about her and my future as i try to live out my faith i would aim to carry on the hope she had in every language to every person i meet.”

It was on the Wave USA tour that Renee was diagnosed with cancer. Her official work with YWAM ended after that, but when she returned to Vancouver to attend college, we were so blessed to have her with us again. We were a part of the same church as well, and it has been my joy to have Renee celebrate the births of both our girls with Wade and I. I remeber the care she took to choose a little blue lamb for our daughter Sophia, n we have a picture of Sophia after her baby shower, asleep on her dad's chest, wearing the little shawl Lindsey made, with the blanket that Leanne made, and the little blue lamb perched right on top.

I want to close this time with a video that was sent to us by Leigh and Angela Oliver, who now live in Australia. Leigh was on the same YWAM training school as Renee, and they were dear friends. It was to Angela and Leigh’s apartment that Renee and Monique first went in Vancouver. Angela was Renee’s leader when she was on staff, and was key in drawing out Renee’s gifts and passions. The Dueck family told us yesterday that Renee was very quiet about her gift of writing and they had guessed, but never knew how gifted she was in this area. Angela commissioned and coaxed writing from Renee that are treasures to us now, constantly encouraging her, even when times were really rough for her in YWAM. Angela is the one I wish were here today to tell you in person about Renee, to lead you in worship, but she was obedient to do what she understood God told her to do, and she is not, so I stand on her shoulders (which is funny to those of you who know exactly how tall Angela is) and present this on Angela and Leigh’s behalf. In this video, it is Angela who introduces Renee, so I suppose technology provides across the miles.

Angela described this video as as a reminder of how Renee “SOoo wanted people to LIVE”. LIVE of course, is a capital, L-I-V-E. Leigh edited this video together for us to see. It is of Angela, Leigh, Audrey, Hannah, Deb and of course Renee, at her dear friend Jacqui’s church in Salt Lake City. In the video you will hear Renee introduce herself and explain the passion of her heart. She then will share a short testimony but what her YWAM training school meant to her, and then the group presents a piece that Renee wrote which she called a “readers’ theatre.” This piece was originally written by Renee for the North American leader’s conference in 2003, and was then performed by several YWAM teams. Over the last few days, several of Renee’s friends from around the world have written to say it is the piece that stayed with them over the years.

I would like to present to you, with the blessing and joy and deep ache of her Youth With A Mission family, now appearing only in heaven for the glory of her Heavenly Father, the lovely Renee Dueck.

Then we played the video of Renee's "Reader's Theatre" piece, which you can see here.

Hope I did okay for you all. Hope I never have to do that again.
The Vancouver service was last night, and now we are exhausted. How must her family feel? I can't even imagine. Thanks for being family to us.

the fridge fairy

So much has happened in the last few weeks, it seems a bit much to try and catch up today, so I will leave you with this.

In amongst a myriad of really intense life experiences, we launched a new business this past weekend. You can read all about it at www.fridgefairy.ca
It's another attempt for us to do business-as-missions in the city, and also an attempt to earn some dough. So far, no responses, so your thoughts and prayers are welcome.


My dear friend Leanne designed the heck out of it, and I was incredulous that on Saturday, our launch date, I was SICK. Like for the first time I can remember, can't get out of bed can't talk have a fever and vomit sick.

Sophia had been talking about how we were going to dress up as fridge Fairies together, but she had to go ahead without me. Today my dear friend Sandra sent me photos of what the table looked like and also what my best friend, the mini Fridge Fairy looked like too.

Now, how can you resist this face?

birthdays

Weird. I have tried to start this post several times over the last two weeks and even just now it disappeared... but here I am! We've had a really great two weeks, so busy and fun with my 35th b-day and Eleanor's 1st! It's amazing to think that just a very short year ago we didn't know who she was, and now she is a crawling, yelling, climbing, daredevil who laughs at everything and keeps us hopping and smiling every day.

I had the best birthday I've had in years (since my 30th, I think) - I had the best day.
Wade and the girls brought me a latte and the cards and pressies that had come in mail in bed in the a.m., then my friends Jana and Reba came to my house and did a spa for me, complete with another coffee (this one from Continental), fresh fruit, champagne and OJ, and a manicure and pedicure. I did actually cry at one point, when Jana showed me the fruit plate, because no one I know would be more passionate about eating huge hunks of fresh fruit and doing a spa in her pjs than Angee Angee (my dear friend, who is doing so well in Australia, by the way) - and noone would have wanted to do it more for me than her - so I had a little cry and Reba said "group hug!" and much joy was shared. Yes, this is all before noon.


Wade and I have been talking about re-painting our bathroom so he painted a huge sign on the bathroom wall that said "Happy Birthday Joanna - I love you!" and then he bought me the cutest bathroom set and wrapped the pieces and hid them all over the house and THEN he encouraged me to go shopping for new towels - by myself, with no kids! And THEN Zellers had 50% off all their towels for one day only - my birthday! So I bought brand new towels for the first time in my life to match my cute new bathroom and I found 3 cute tops that fit me (rare these days and such a gift!) and THEN Wade took me out to dinner (on a gift card we had - whoo hoo!) to an amazing restaurant and THEN we went to pub were our friend Lukas works and THEN my friends Shannon and Cindy unexpectedly walked in and we got to hang with them, and Lukas wouldn't let us pay for anything and Jana babysat (yeah, she's pretty much a rock star) and the kids slept and were awesome!
I know! Shut up. I know.

Me wearing my new shirt with my unbelievable birthday dessert. Yes, that is chocolate cheese cake AND espresso gelle and a really fancy doughnut. And yes, that does say "Happy Birthday Joanna" in chocolate calligraphy. And I am more than a little giddy. As you can tell.

Eleanor's b-day was also really great. On her actual birthday, the 12th, I had a banana bread in the freezer that Angee had baked before they left for Australia, so Angela actually managed to bake Sophia's cake AND Eleanor's cake this year - from across he world. Yes, she is that good.


We had big party for Eleanor on the 14th and we did the little tradition we did with Sophia when she turned one, of having everyone write wishes and blessings on blocks and present them to her. (My friend Mel suggested this tradition - the trick is to give the baby a stainless steel bowl, so she thinks the sound of the blocks going in is super satisfying!)


It was so special, and she was the perfect party host, totally calm and happy. Her cake that day was an Australian Chocolate Ripple Cake which Eleanor's godfather Ben introduced us to the Christmas of 2004. The choc ripple cookies were provided by Ange and Leigh and Uncle Stuart - good thing this girl has so many Aussie honorary relatives - the cake took three packs of cookies and was shaped like a rugby ball by the time we were done! It had matcha green tea truffles from Dutch Girl on the top which we hid from the children and savoured later!

By the way, when people tell me that Sophia and I look alike, I honestly don't really see it, because she doesn't really look like I did when I was little. But in this picture above, I get it, I really get it!

What a great life we lead... thanks everyone who called and came and facebooked and mailed. Love you!